Ah yes, good catch and good question. A quick solution would be to move initialization of rtpp_socks out of child_init() and instead do it on demand whenever it's needed, i.e. just before sending a request and only when something in the list of proxies has changed (or if it hasn't been initialized yet).
The code then just needs a way to detect changes to the lists. This can be done for example by keeping a global running counter in shared memory (protected by a lock) and a private per-child counter. Every time a change is made, the global shared counter is increased by one and every time a child wants to send a request, it compares its private counter with the shared one and if it doesn't match, it rebuilds its rtpp_socks.
Another option would be to use pnode->idx and have each child keep the size of its rtpp_socks array. If a child wants to send a request to a node with an idx larger than its array size, it grows and rebuilds the rtpp_socks array as needed. This would only catch new additions to the linked lists but no other changes.
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